It happens. Just when you think you’re finally settling into your empty nest, your kids return. Maybe they just graduated college and are trying to find work and need a place to stay in the interim. Or perhaps they are trying to save money to move out on their own. Either way, while you want the best for your child, it shouldn’t become a financial albatross for you as a parent. The financial implications can be extensive if you don’t lay down some ground rules early. You want your adult kids to feel welcome, but they need to understand they have responsibilities in this relationship too.
Be Aware of the Impact on Your Finances
Before agreeing to have your adult children return to the nest to roost for a while, it’s a good idea to inventory what that really means for your financial situation and how you’re going to respond to avoid unnecessary hardships.
Chances are, you’ve adjusted your spending as empty nesters and must now consider a new budget for your growing household, including increases in the following:
- Food costs
- Utility bills
- Internet and data fees
- Added housekeeping costs
You don’t have to sacrifice your own financial situation for the sake of your adult child. However, you need to be aware of added costs and discuss a plan with your child to account for those expenses. After all, you worked hard and saved in order to have a little extra when your kids decided to move out.
Establish Financial Expectations for Your Adult Children
It’s crucial for you and your adult child to understand that this is not a “free ride.” Your child will have certain privileges living at home, but also specific responsibilities for doing so as well. You might consider charging a reduced rate of rent to cover the added costs or have a list of chores around the house they can do to help out. Perhaps, they can handle the lawn care or pool maintenance, which can save on costs if you’ve paid for these services in the past.
Not only does this teach essential life lessons, but it also helps them stay motivated to leave the den. When they do, they will have developed a few necessary life skills to help them live independently at this point.
Create a Plan and Set Boundaries
Perhaps one of the best things you can do for adult children in this situation is to give them a time-limit for living in your home. Be it six months or one year, they know, when they move in, that they need to be planning and saving for the future. If you’re in a fortunate position not to need money from your children, consider asking them for rent anyway. Then set that money (or even a portion of it) aside each month to return to them as a “housewarming gift” when they eventually do leave the nest.
The last thing you want is for your adult children to enjoy an endless party with no responsibilities — at your expense. They may never feel the need to leave home if that is the case. Your role as a parent is to provide your children with the knowledge and skills they need to make their way in the world. Sometimes, it takes tough love to get them out of the nest and soaring on their own.
We’re Here to Help!
As your credit union, we understand that the unexpected happens in life all the time. Whether you have adult children returning to the nest or other unexpected obstacles present themselves, we can help you with sound financial advice, affordable interest rates, and friendly, knowledgeable service.
We’re always ready to help! Please stop by one of our convenient branch locations or call 800-782-4899 to learn more.
Each individual’s financial situation is unique and readers are encouraged to contact the Credit Union when seeking financial advice on the products and services discussed. This article is for educational purposes only; the authors assume no legal responsibility for the completeness or accuracy of the contents.